“There is no self that will survive
a real conversation.” David Whyte
Conversation is the unit of experience between people.
An organization is in fact many
conversations.
In his "Vision for the Future : Congregations and Beyond",
Peter Morales asserted that there are more people who hold values of Unitarian Universalism outside of our churches
than in it. We may offer various reasons
--- perhaps secularization, urban stress, displacement, or other sociological
reasons, but how about this:
What conversation do we invite people into?
Bereft of dogma and clear answers to world problems, do we even have a basic common worldview, albeit tentative, that guides us in deriving meaning from the conundrums of life?
Bereft of dogma and clear answers to world problems, do we even have a basic common worldview, albeit tentative, that guides us in deriving meaning from the conundrums of life?
For instance, when we are
bothered by poverty in the developing world, do we see it as related to the same poverty in the developed world?
Most religions do: They will say hatred is the problem, or maybe
fear. Others will say, the problem is
Islam. What do we say?
Not even delving into prescriptions beginning
with Do Not, what can we Do?
And isn’t there an urgency to bring us all into a basic
understanding of human rights and needs? Isn’t it that when a person begins to
know their rights and needs, they achieve a clarity on what is important? And isn't it important we help bring
each other to the realization that all of our needs and rights are entangled?
Research shows that people living in less certain times
cling more strongly to beliefs and superstitions to have a better handle on the
world. Where the world is more
tumultuous, there is a surge of religion and even radicalization of
adherents. Where the world is more
stable and predictable, despite economic and political ups and down, jails are
closing along with churches.
These two worlds --- the certain and the uncertain --- need
to be invited to converse at the same table.
It is not enough that we are welcoming.
The urgency shows that when people do not sit at the table of humanity
on equal footing with each other, they can form into dangerous clusters
centered on hatred.
We all say our faith is welcoming, but are our members
communicating this welcoming experience as individuals? Are we welcoming the unwelcoming but short of
moving them to openness?
What Got Us Here Is Not Taking Us Where We Want To Go
Despite years of seeking the very reason for why there are more people who hold
our principles dearly outside of our churches than inside it, we have not
increased our numbers. The cop-out response is to say we do not evangelize.
But inviting is not evangelizing. We have no doctrine to insist upon. However, our principles are shorthand for the process
of arriving at the United Nations Declaration of Human Rights which covenants
most of humanity. And we have that potential to hold the perpetual conversation on matters of respect for life, liberty, and inquiry.
Absence is a brain drain.
The shaky attendance in our churches is putting a toll on our abilities
to think better about our church’s future.
There is simply more wisdom in more perspectives. And perhaps we are not
getting enough of the perspectives we need to move forward better.
It is time to examine other ways of seeing the problem of dwindling churches.
For struggling churches, the perceived conundrums involving seeking the right mix between:
1. Religion - Secular
2. Spiritual - Intellectual
3. Self-help - Altruistic
However, I will assert here intuitively that when people do engage in conversation, they tend to look for:
1.
Solemn vs Fun
2.
Polite vs Candi
3.
Genuine vs Entertaining
4.
Closed vs Open
5. Comforting vs Challenging
6.
Peronsal vs Impersonal
7.
Boring vs Engaging
8.
Common experience vs Culture Shock
The first list (of conundrums before the list above) seems to be structure-oriented,
while the second list (of conversational features on the list directly above this statement) seems feelings-oriented.
The Good Old Worship Structure
Both lists however may intersect within the following
spectrums:
1. Linear <-> Non-Linear
2. Informative <-> Empowering
3. Short <-> Long
4. Fast <-> Short
5. Focused <-> Decentralized
6. Facilitated <-> Freestyle
7. Routine <-> Novel
8. Conceptual < - > Practical
We need to explore conversational models to not just “make our services more inviting”, but “to serve by inviting”.
In so doing, our old “worship structure” may need to give
way to a “conversation structure” with the following desired outcomes for each
participant or member:
1. Adherence to and engagement in our 7 principles
2. Higher interest in enriching and sustaining our
movement
3. Greater interest in bridging cultures around the
world
Standalone Worships Are Dole-outs
(This part has been added to clarify as a response to Rev. James Galasinski's concerns.)
Our worships are like dole-outs, you come get some peace and may never appear again. And we know the problem with dole-outs is that the energy exchange is neither fair nor free. There is a skewed dependency, not a healthy interdependence has been established. It is like a uni-directional mass during the Catholic upbringing, I go and download and my mind is inhibited subconsciously from even exploring my truth.
Worships should not be alien to practical community life. Worships should reflect our life and not dictate upon it by talking about the ideals; by witnessing to the way we live, not just by developing more and more eloquent ways of articulating our values.
Standalone Worships Are Dole-outs
(This part has been added to clarify as a response to Rev. James Galasinski's concerns.)
Our worships are like dole-outs, you come get some peace and may never appear again. And we know the problem with dole-outs is that the energy exchange is neither fair nor free. There is a skewed dependency, not a healthy interdependence has been established. It is like a uni-directional mass during the Catholic upbringing, I go and download and my mind is inhibited subconsciously from even exploring my truth.
Worships should not be alien to practical community life. Worships should reflect our life and not dictate upon it by talking about the ideals; by witnessing to the way we live, not just by developing more and more eloquent ways of articulating our values.
Change first inhabits conversation.
Having no dogma or prescriptions, perhaps what
we can offer the world is our way of conversing openly, lovingly, and
invitingly.
I invite you to explore alternative forms of worship life.
Going beyond the one-hour meeting in the main prayer hall, what kind of life do we support each other in living? Let me offer an example, which is a living document that I will keep on enhancing:
Experimental
Structure 1:
Opening Words
Bell and Chalice
Petitions for Humanity– Build and focus on empathy and avoid the ego-driven self-promoting/ self-righteous pitfalls of joys and concerns. What are the causes for concern for humanity as a whole, focusing on recent events commonly experienced? Petitions are written / emailed way up to a day before the worship. They should have been categorized and are announced at this time. Each petition should include a mention of how to help or ease the situation. (It might be good to have a response set up like "May they find peace.")
Opening Song
Restoring Faith in Humanity – announcing blessed moments, gratefulness for acts of kindness or blessing, on pieces of paper read aloud, burned and thrown into the water dish to bless it.
Practical and Genuine Joys and Concerns -- break out into functional tribes – realizing that you should belong to one, where people will look after you with their own resources and not rely solely on the church. The church steps in as a next-level support – through pastoral care or other material intervention. [Breaking bread to release formalities.]
Re-gathering Song
Concerns for Community - If a tribe is challenged to support one of its members, that’s the only time they can speak of it as concern for community to appeal for inter-tribal support -- a member or a whole tribe aids them.
Lecture / Highly Informative Sermon - speaker for the day should be conscious that this is the only opportunity for adult education in this forum, and educating on the practical wisdom of humanistic values should be paramount. Wonder and hanging questions are encouraged, but also instructional work.
Offertory / Song
Free Insights: One representative from each tribe will speak.. Representatives change each time. Each representative is assigned at Practical and Genuine Joys and Concerns.
Benediction - Commit the blessed water (blessed in Restoring Faith in Humanity) back to the earth to bless the Circle of Life. (Song)
Extinguish the Chalice, Ringing the Bell
Final Hymn
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I welcome everyone to please comment below.